My transition

The past week I have been reflecting on our move to Guam and how the transition is going. I know I have talked a lot about our move but I hope you understand how this move has rocked my world and therefore is the topic I am often consumed with and wish to discuss. I feel like so much as happened within this short period that has forever changed my life; my mom says I should write a book about my recent experiences because a large portion of them have been quite entertaining/ odd/ educational. When Jarrett and I got married and I made the 4 hour move to northern California, I soon became consumed with overwhelming sadness. It would be fair to say that I was probably experiencing a mild/ moderate depression. For the first three months at Travis I did not work, go to school, have a solid home church, or friends. My days were spent at home alone where I spent most of my time in front of the tv or sleeping. Those first 3 months culminated into probably the hardest time in my life thus far. The weeks leading up to our move to Guam, I became consumed with the fear that I would again experience what I had in those first 3 months at Travis. From the moment I walked off the plane in Guam, I became obsessed with getting busy, involved in things, finding a job, and friends. I think about it now and that probably wasn't the healthiest thing to do but for me I was in survival mode and nothing could stop me. Now that we are getting settled in, I am reflecting on how the Lord has truly blessed us with an easy transition. Maybe it's the fact that it's not the first time moving away from family, or that I have found a good job and have gotten involved in various activities. Or maybe it's the fact that i am just more mature. Whatever it may be, I feel blessed. I have experienced homesickness but that can only be expected. I have felt overwhelmed and sad at times but I believe that is only healthy and natural.

I feel proud of myself for putting myself out there and being bold. I found a job off base and have made friends with many locals which is something that a lot of military don't do here. I choose not to stick to the base because I have been so blessed by the culture and people here in Guam. It has been tough because of cultural differences but rewarding none the less. I have met senators, radio personalities, and other local figures due to my job and I don't believe that would have happened unless I had put myself out there.

But along with the wonderful things we have experienced, there has been a fair share of discouraging events. I have met people that didn't have my best interest in mind which has been a very hard lesson to learn, especially this week when I was faced with a painful and heartbreaking situation. We are also learning how to celebrate the holidays away from family and how to create our own traditions. This is fun but at the same time a sad thing to learn how to do especially if you are stubborn like me. And we are learning how to accept or at least respect cultural differences that we don't agree with or believe are "right."

Many times in the past few months my heart has felt heavy and I have prayed so many prayers asking the Lord to carry me through this trying period in my life. But also in the past few months I feel I have matured and grown in ways that would not have been possible if it wasn't for this move. I know without a doubt that I will look back on this time and smile no matter how many tears were shed. I'm thankful that I can see that now.

Home Sweet Home or something like it

How does one make a house into a home? This is the question that I have asked myself countless times over the past few months, but even more so in the past couple weeks. I think it takes at least a year for a house to finally feel like home. A year to work all the kinks out, figure out where everything should go, etc. But I'm impatient. Home and how it feels when you walk into it is so important to me because I am a homebody. My favorite nights are the ones spent at home curled up on the couch with a good book and my husband by my side. I love to be at home. Maybe I'm just really homesick but this house just doesn't feel like home one bit. It feels like a shell still that needs some major TLC. I find myself complaining lately about everything that has to do with this house. The walls are too white, the tile is too white and gets dirty so easily, the house is too big, we don't have enough money for furniture, our furniture is too small, and so on. Never thought I'd find myself complaining about a house being too big but the grass is always greener on the other side isn't it. We moved from a tiny 900 square foot townhouse into a large 1600+ square foot single family home and our furniture just doesn't fill it. So many things that frustrate me that I'm struggling to find the motivation to try and make this house into a home; I don't know where to even begin. At the same time, I'm disgusted with myself that I even have these frustrations because so many people do not have the luxuries that Jarrett and I do. So many do not have a large roof to cover their heads at night. So many people on this island alone would do anything to live in a house like we do. I am so extremely thankful for the blessings that we have and the fact that I have my wonderful husband whose very being fills the space between these walls. I'm just trying to be honest here and open about my frustrations. So anyone have any inexpensive, easy suggestions about how you make a house into a home? And here are some pictures of our living room so far. It's pretty much the only room that we have really put some time and money into thus far.

Life Life Life

Life is a roller coaster. Boy is it ever. I can't believe we have been in Guam for almost 3 months. It doesn't feel like that long but at the same time it does. We are homesick. Plain and simple. We often lay in bed, unable to fall asleep, just talking about home and the things we miss. It's not that we aren't taking advantage of Guam or that we are just living for what's to come in the future instead of living for today. It's just that the longer we are here, we are learning things that we miss and wish were here, and things about Guam that don't make us so happy. But we are making do. We have each other and because of that, we could live almost anywhere and still be happy.

I know a couple of weeks ago I wrote about my new job. Well I guess just because you like a place doesn't mean you are going to like working there. It's been challenging. So I am currently in limbo as far as the job situation goes. I'm just praying that the Lord would lead me to make the right decisions regarding my job situation. Other happenings...it was my birthday on Monday. The day was pretty relaxing. I could kiss the person who invented manicures and pedicures. But there was also a first for me. I was pulled over for speeding...on my birthday! 54 in a 35...yikes. The thing about driving here in Guam is the speed limit is 35 almost everywhere but people drive 50+. Not that that makes it ok, but it's normal here. Well apparently about once a quarter, the Guam PD sets up speed traps. Well I got caught in one. They pulled everyone over into this empty field and I was there along with about 15 other cars. A lot of military and other spouses. Well the cop saw it was my birthday so he couldn't give me a ticket and also because I like USC football, which happened to be his favorite team. I got very lucky because I do feel I was very deserving of the ticket. I gave myself a slap on the wrist. Ironic thing was that just the day before i was bragging to my father in law on skype about how I had never been pulled over and I was making fun of Jarrett for all the tickets he has gotten. Well I think the Lord was trying to humble me.

Other exciting news is that I was accepted to Penn State! I am so excited to finally finish my degree and through a good school to beat. I'm going to give my diploma a big fat kiss when it is placed into my hands! It's a perfect situation since I will be moving home next summer for quite some time while Jarrett is deployed. I may even be able to finish while i am home so that I can travel to Pennsylvania and walk in the ceremony.

Well that's the update. Now I'm off to go get ready for a military appreciation cocktail party at Louis Vuitton. It's hard to find reasons to get all dressed up these days. No proms or dances to get dolled up for. So I am excited to put on a cute cocktail dress, do my hair, and slip on some heals. Happy Friday!! (Almost Friday for those of you in the states)

I know why I married him...

This week has been a particularly hard week. I worked 8 hour shifts 6 days straight. That might not sound hard for some people, but I haven't worked in well over a year because of school, so I am not used to the hours or standing on my feet for 8 hours straight. The hours have taken a toll on my body, my emotions, and my sleep (I have to get up at 5:30 am). Well my poor husband has had to listen to my rants about customers and others, my cries, and my complaints about my feet hurting for the past week. I feel bad. But being the wonderful man that he is, he listens, talks to me, and takes care of me in so many ways. My birthday is Monday and I came home today to a gift bag full of goodies. He couldn't wait until Monday for me to open it, so he asked me to open it tonight. I have to say that this present was probably one of my most favorites, if not my most favorite I have ever gotten. Not because it cost a lot of money, or was extravagant, but because it was so deeply thoughtful. Ok so first I unwrapped the last season of Gilmore Girls that he picked up for me at the library today.Yay! Also included in the bag was a to-go mug for my coffee in the morning, a Guam key chain because I have a Harley Davidson key chain on my house keys because that's how the landlord gave them to us, a CD with a bunch of Christian artists on it, a bottle of Victoria's Secret lotion that I used to wear every day when I was a freshman in high school (the year we met), my favorite shortbread cookies, and a book by the same author that wrote The Five Love Languages. My husband knows me well and that was illustrated by all the thoughtful gifts he had picked out for me. My day was brightened immediately and I was reminded exactly why I married my husband. He loves me through and through, listens to my dramatic rants, makes me coffee and draws me a bath before I get home, and he knows me like no one else knows me (except for God of course). So in the midst of one crazy, difficult, conflicting week, I am so thankful I have my husband by my side to help me through it all.

School

Education has always been a major priority in my life. I worked ridiculously hard in high school, took a number of AP and honors courses, and got a tutor for the SATs so that I could get into a good college and receive a quality college education. I went to all these lengths mainly for myself and because I knew I was capable of doing well, but also because I'm extremely competitive. Well to put it lightly, my college experience has turned out slightly different than expected. It started at Cal Poly and that lasted for one year. Jarrett and I got married at the beginning of what would have been my sophomore year and so I left Cal Poly and moved up north. I took a quarter (or semester) off and then started classes at the local community college that January. This was a very humbling experience for me. I was used to all of the things that the university level offers and I already knew I was capable of succeeding at a university level, so I felt that the community college was a set back for me. In the end, the year I spent at the local community college turned out to be a very rewarding educational experience. After a year at the community college, I finally had enough credits to transfer to UC Davis. I started classes there in January and as you know, that only lasted until June. I think leaving UC Davis has been probably one of the hardest parts of moving to Guam. I was so excited to receive my degree at Davis, I loved all of the professors that I had in those short 6 months, and I loved being surrounded by people that were passionate about school and excited to learn. For months I have researched what the next step in my education will be. I have about a year and a half left until I receive my bachelors. Unfortunately, my major is not offered anywhere on the island or online, so due to a change in major, it might take me an extra semester to receive my degree. Once we arrived here, I visited the university on the island and was sadly disappointed. I was passed around like a hacky sack from person to person because no one knew what to do with me and all my transfer units. They greatly encouraged me to be a home-economics major and when I strongly refused, they were insulted. So I moved on to plan B. Online schools. I have been very picky when it comes to online schools and slightly hesitant, once again due to my competitive nature and the fact that I feel like going to school online is just not at the same level as sitting in a class at UC Davis. Well after much research I stumbled upon a program at Penn State. They have a world campus which offers enough courses online to complete a degree. Students receive the same quality education that they would if they were sitting in the classroom. Graduates walk at the ceremony to receive their diploma with everyone else, and the diploma is the same as those who went to class in person. I am so excited about this opportunity because every aspect of it meets my standards. I am just awaiting word about whether or not I have been accepted, so I am writing this to ask for prayer. And if this doesn't work out, I pray that the Lord would shine light onto other opportunities.

Oh and to add a picture to this boring blog, here is a picture of Jarrett's first day back at school. He is taking an economics class right now and working towards his bachelor's through the University of Maryland. I'm so proud of him.

Random Facts About Guam

We have hit the two month mark as Guam residents. Over the past couple months I have composed a list of things about Guam that make it unique. Some are cool, some are not so cool, and some are just plain strange.
1. Everyone runs on "Chamorro time" or island time. This means everything is done at a much slower pace whether it be driving, preparing your food, or trying to fix a problem such as a busted dishwasher that is flooding your kitchen.
2. The highest speed limit is 45 although most non-locals drive at least 50. If you get pulled over, you are required to pay something like 5 dollars for every mph over the speed limit you went and that is it.
3. A Guamanian is someone who immigrated to the island. A Chamorro is someone who was born and raised here. Or something along those lines.
4. There are a ton of stray dogs here and they are called "boonie dogs." Some look stray and some look like perfectly cute puppies. They sometimes rome in packs and most are scared of humans. There is no rabies on Guam. As a dog lover this is particularly hard for me. I saw a boonie dog get hit by a car and it traumatized me for life. Jarrett thinks he is going to come home to a house full of boonie dogs.
5. The majority of tourists are from Japan. Hence why mostly everything is written in Japanese and English, at least down in Tumon which is the tourist area.
6. Everyone says "Hafa Adai!" Which is I guess the equivalent to people saying "Aloha" in Hawaii.
7. People like to hike around here, and if you go hiking at a place without a trail it is called "boonie stomping."
8. A crappy, rusted, beat up car is called a "boonie car." We own one!
9. Locals chew some strange tobaccos here. One called betelnut which turns your mouth red.
10. Most locals welcome outsiders but others are very territorial over their land, girls, beaches, certain hang out spots, etc.
11. The south end of the island is where a lot of the old locals live.
12. People complain about driving distances even though the island is only 30 miles long. For instance, someone came into the restaurant that I work at when we had just closed and they complained that they had driven all the way from Navy. A total of about 15 miles.
13. Spam is very popular.
14. Some locals tell me I look like Lindsay Lohan. I'm not sure whether or not to take that as a compliment considering well...many reasons.
16. The AC in most buildings is set at a chilly 65 or below. Making it this cold inside is not necessary regardless of the temperature outside. This causes me to bring a sweatshirt with me wherever I go even if it is 90 outside.
17. Guam is like the melting pot of Pacific Islanders. People come all over from Palau, Pohnpei, Chuuk, Samoa, Saipan, Rota, Tinian just to name a few.
18. Guam thinks the beer of America is Budweiser or Bud Light. They don't even ship Coors to the island.
19. Everything is a day later here even though we are a day ahead in time. TV programs shown on Monday nights in the states come on Tuesday nights here. This can get confusing and I often forget what day it is.
20. The motto is "Where America's day begins."
21. The roads are made of coral and they have a lot of potholes and frogs on them that get squished.
22. The guys I work with like to point out that I am often the only white person in the whole restaurant. And if a white person walks in, they announce that I am no longer the only white person.
23. People don't tip here. In fact, a 10% gratuity is charged to each bill at most restaurants because of this. At first I thought I was a bad waitress but then I figured this out. I had a $67 bill the other day and guess what my tip was? $0.00
24. Nobody uses street names here. All directions are given by landmarks. To illustrate this for you, when we were signing up for our utilities, each place made us draw a map of where our house is located so that they could find our house. When asking for directions the reply often sounds like this "turn right at the Mobil station, go through three stop lights, and then turn left at the dog tied to the tree."
25. The people of Guam live the island life. Reggae is blasted, flip flops are the shoe of choice, fruity drinks are sipped, bars on the beach are popular places to be, and the outdoors are enjoyed.
26. First birthdays are HUGE celebrations. Deaths are honored with rosaries and week long festivities. Cook outs on the beach are very popular. And fiestas are going on every weekend.

Well there you are. I could list more but I will save you. I could write a book. I am falling more in love with Guam, its people, and culture every day.

...and everything nice.

So I got a job!!! Ok so let me start by telling you how AMAZING our God is! I have been searching for a job ever since we arrived on this island. It is a little difficult for non-locals to find jobs but for understandable reasons such as the fact that military don't live here permanently. I submitted application after application, resume after resume with no such luck. Anyways, I found this cafe the week we arrived called Sugar and Spice and I LOVE it. I fell in love with this cafe for a number of reasons such as the atmosphere (nice and cozy), the coffee, and the fact that the owner is from San Francisco and all the food has a California flair to it. I started going to this cafe at least once a week, more when we were living in the hotel nearby. A couple weeks after we arrived, I asked the owner if they were hiring and he said to bring my resume in. For some reason, I never dropped my resume off. Well last week I had an interview for a retail store and to put it lightly, it didn't go well. I was feeling really down when I left. As I was driving home, I felt the Lord strongly urge me to turn around and go back to Sugar and Spice. I just so happened to have an extra resume in my car, so I walked in and lo and behold, the cafe was completely empty and the owner was there hanging out. He pretty much interviewed me on the spot, said he remembered me, and that he really liked my resume. He recognized that I had gone to Cal Poly and UC Davis and was impressed. The next day he hired me! To make this story even more amazing is the same day I got hired, we got a call that my car had arrived on island and was ready to be picked up. That wouldn't sound too exciting if it wasn't for the fact that my car wasn't supposed to arrive for another 3 weeks! So I am now a full time server at Sugar and Spice and I'm being trained to do inventory and calculate employee cost. The manager knows that my husband is military so he gave me morning shifts so that I can be with Jarrett at night. I have felt so overwhelmed by the Lord this week and how GOOD He is to us. The Lord truly did answer my prayers, and even though it felt like forever, it was in His perfect timing. He knew that I wasn't ready to start working right away, He knew that I would need my car, and He knew that working at my favorite place on the island would make me feel comfortable and happy. I feel so blessed and taken care of by my Heavenly Father.